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Dream of dieing

I usually don't remember dreams, but I guess this one was sufficiently strange to leave me boggled and wondering.

In short, I dreamt of dieing via execution. The interesting part was, that my closest friends knew about it, and were not worried one bit. In fact, one of them actually tried to explain me why my execution will be a sure thing, quadruple-checked by all sorts of safety meassures, all the while smiling. I laughed with them at that time, untill I realized I am the one to whome those safety meassures apply. Crippling fear flowed like a hot river through my veins. I woke up several times due to this fear, with the very same fear present in my real body, feeling relief every time when I realized I'm not going to die, but dozed off again and again. Astonishingly, the dream continued every time I fell asleep again. It was like mad curiosity we sometimes have in dreams. I wanted to know what happens next, and how the story continues.

The execution was kind of horrid. I was supposed to be streched till my body broke. Luckily I didn't "witness" that one anymore.

This dream might be a message, considering the timing.

Dieing can be interpreted as a new begining. Which, no matter how I look at it, I am about to have from the perspective of my life in general. The fact that it was not regarded as a tragedy by those who love me, but rather as something to celebrate is another hint contributing to this interpretation. I think it's also interesting that death occurs due to stretching (or expansion ...) and not by some other method.

Lastly, this dream helped me realize how enormously my bodily ego fears death. Connecting to the fabric of consciousness also means death for the bodily ego - or at least this is how it interprets it - thus, fear of death can be a strong element of resistance. While the fear allows mediocre level connections, it strongly resists very strong ones which seriously "threaten" "superiority"/control for the bodily ego.

In esoteric traditions, death is really initiation. It's the death of old ways of thinking, old blockages, old obstacles, and birth into a new, freer existence, one where you can expand and explore. In this context, death is a breath of fresh air.

Of course, this spiritual "death" is not really death of the [spwiki]Bodily Ego[/spwiki]. It is more ascension of the bodily ego and union with your higher spiritual self, the [spwiki]Atman[/spwiki], soul, or [spwiki]Spiritual Ego[/spwiki]. I know I've posted this poem before, but its worth posting it again. This is my account of my [spwiki]Union Experience[/spwiki]. This is my realization that bodily ego does not die when we make a [spwiki]connection[/spwiki]. In fact, like a balloon, it inflates.

I think, however, that esoteric traditions construct and make up the fear so as to scare us away from connection. The fear is not rational. It is deeply buried and more of an instinctual aversion than anything else, I think.

 

 

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In esoteric traditions, death is really initiation. It's the death of old ways of thinking, old blockages, old obstacles, and birth into a new, freer existence, one where you can expand and explore. In this context, death is a breath of fresh air.

Yes, I interpreted it just like that.

Btw, speaking about dreams... A month ago or so, I had a connection experience in a dream. It felt just like the real deal. Symptoms, effects, challenges etc. were exactly like I experience it in the "real world". Interesting that something like that can exist. I think it sheds some light on the relationship between the bodily ego, the spiritual ego, and what happens with consciousness when we sleep.

I think, however, that esoteric traditions construct and make up the fear so as to scare us away from connection. The fear is not rational. It is deeply buried and more of an instinctual aversion than anything else, I think.

Couldn't agree more. I remember some years ago, when I first pushed for proper connection, how I had this uneasy feeling of "jumping into the unknown", a feeling that was almost like the feeling one has when one wants to jump off a cliff where you don't see the bottom of where you jump into. It was very strange indeed. By now, this feeling is not overwhelming anymore. Generally, it seems that much of the fear associated with connection has subsided from my conditioning. The funny part is, I couldn't even point out where I have learned that fear, who implanted it, or why it came about in general. It's not like I have read any other text on spirituality except the LP - at least not extensively. It must have been church (I was forced to go to church when I was quite young, even though I disliked it.) But it could also be a consequence of residual materialistic beliefs. If one's thinking is based on materialism, naturally, one will end up equating the death of one's body with the death of the consciousness that it carries. The pernicious part is, that this works vice versa, too. Carrying a materialistic belief, one will equate the altering (considerable expansion) of one's consciousness with the death/altering of the body. And the body is programmed to forestall that as long as possible, for it is programmed to survive. It's an interesting psychological trick to avert connecting.

Btw, did you write this poem after your union experience, or was the union experience manifested as the creation of this poem?

Quote from aim on July 8, 2019, 4:24 am

Btw, did you write this poem after your union experience, or was the union experience manifested as the creation of this poem?

That's an excellent question. It was manifested as the creation of the poem.

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